māṁ khedayaty etad ajasya janma-
māṁ khedayaty etad ajasya janma-
viḍambanaṁ yad vasudeva-gehe
vraje ca vāso ’ri-bhayād iva svayaṁ
purād vyavātsīd yad-ananta-vīryaḥ
Kṛṣṇa’s appearance in the prison house of Kaṁsa in miserable circumstances, his stay in Vraja out of fear of enemies, and his leaving Mathurā though he has infinite power used to give me great suffering.
I have revealed the truth to you as I have understood it. However, I could not understand this difficult subject before, even though I asked learned people. Thus previously I was full of grief. That is explained in this verse. How is it possible for a person without birth to take birth? There should be no grief if what appears to be a birth is actually only an imitation of birth and is not actual birth. It should be understood that Uddhava intends to show that Kṛṣṇa has both actual birth and an appearance of a birth. His birth in the prison of Kaṁsa gives me pain. This actually means it previously gave me pain. The present tense is often used to express times near to the present. Because his birth pastime even in degraded circumstance should create the greatest joy in his mother, father, friends, and other devotees, why did he as the independent lord not do anything about this? He is naturally full of bliss but why is he known to stay in Vraja out of fear of enemies? The word iva is used to express the fact that he should not have been afraid of Kaṁsa while living in Vraja. Then he fled from Mathurā. Though he has unlimited strength he fled from Kālayavana and others out of fear. Bhīṣma has said:
na hy asya karhicid rājan pumān veda vidhitsitam
yad vijijñāsayā yuktā muhyanti kavayo ’pi hi
O King, no one can know the plan of Kṛṣṇa. Even though great philosophers inquire exhaustively, they are bewildered. SB 1.9.16
However, when I asked the Lord in private he enlightened me. Now my lamentation has gone.
|| 3.2.17 ||
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